Ballerina Farm Is Not Oppressed
The portrayal of “Ballerina Farm” as an oppressed woman, held back from living out her dreams, is deeply flawed and reveals a misunderstanding of personal agency and choice. There seems to be a pervasive narrative on the internet, especially within certain feminist circles, that paints this woman as a victim — someone who gave up her career as a ballerina to live on a farm and raise her children in submission to a man. However, this depiction ignores her autonomy and reduces her decision to something that she is purportedly “forced” into, which is patronizing and dismissive of her right to live the life she chooses.
At the heart of this issue is a misunderstanding of what feminism stands for. Feminism, at its core, is about *choice* — the ability for women to have the freedom to decide how they want to live their lives. For generations, women fought for the right to have options. Whether that means pursuing a high-powered career, becoming an astronaut, or opting for a quieter, slower-paced life on a farm, the essence of feminism is in supporting a woman’s right to choose what brings her peace and fulfillment.
In the case of Ballerina Farm, she made an intentional and conscious decision to leave behind a career as a ballerina and embrace a rural lifestyle. Far from being a rash or oppressive choice, this decision was grounded in her own preferences and values. She lived in the city and didn’t like it, so she changed her circumstances to match her desires. She chose a life on the farm, not just for the peace it offered but because it aligned with her vision for raising her children. This was not a sacrifice born out of helplessness or coercion, but rather a choice made by a woman with the resources and privilege to shape her life on her own terms.
The infantilization of her decision by others — who frame her as being somehow “trapped” in a life she didn’t want — is both insulting and misguided. To imply that Ballerina Farm is oppressed because she doesn’t adhere to the modern standards of “girl boss” feminism is not only patronizing, it’s counterproductive to the feminist cause itself. It positions modern-day feminism as a rigid structure, where the only acceptable form of female empowerment is one that involves professional success or independence from traditional domestic roles. This negates the very foundation of feminism: women having the *right to choose* what makes them happy, whether that fits societal expectations or not.
In today’s world, the pressure to constantly be on the move, to achieve, to rise in the ranks of one’s career, and to “prove” one’s success in a materialistic way is intense. However, not every woman desires to be a CEO, a world traveler, or a powerhouse in the corporate world. For some, success and fulfillment may come in the form of creating a peaceful home, growing their own food, and living a simpler, quieter life. Just because these choices don’t align with the hyper-productivity and career-driven ideals that dominate contemporary feminist discourse doesn’t mean they are less valuable. In fact, for many women like Ballerina Farm, they represent the ultimate form of freedom — being able to walk away from the societal treadmill of success and create their own version of happiness.
Moreover, Ballerina Farm’s lifestyle is far from one of financial or emotional dependence. She has a wealthy husband, which allows her the financial stability to stay home and take care of her children. This is not a woman struggling to get by, nor is she mentally or emotionally drained by her circumstances. She has found peace and stability in her rural lifestyle, which she has carefully chosen. The insistence that her submission to traditional gender roles is automatically a form of oppression is outdated and frankly narrow-minded. Financial stability and the privilege of being able to stay home with children are, in many cases, privileges that some women actively seek. To critique Ballerina Farm for living a lifestyle that works for her because it doesn’t fit into a feminist ideal of what a “successful” woman looks like is unfair and patronizing.
Finally, we must recognize that women are not a monolith. The diversity of women’s experiences, aspirations, and values is vast. Feminism should not dictate one rigid path toward empowerment but should instead be a movement that embraces and celebrates the different ways women find fulfillment. Some women will find joy in career success, others in artistic pursuits, and still others in nurturing their families on a farm. All these choices are valid, and none should be dismissed as less empowering than the other.
In conclusion, the criticism surrounding Ballerina Farm’s life choices is misguided and rooted in a misunderstanding of feminism. To infantilize her decision and claim she is oppressed simply because her lifestyle doesn’t align with modern feminist ideals is to undermine her agency. Feminism is about choice, and her choice to live on a farm, raise her children, and submit to a traditional domestic life is her own. It brings her peace, stability, and joy — values that, for her, outweigh any other external measure of success. Instead of criticizing her, we should respect her autonomy and celebrate the fact that women today have the freedom to choose their own path, whatever it may look like.